That Ol'e Higher Power Really Does Work In Mysterious Ways

Have you ever heard that saying the #Lord , God, that #HigherPower works in Mysterious ways? Okay well I know I am probably not the best example to Future #survivors You guys just kind of have to look at me like a Mom lol "Do as I say Not as I do ".

Anyway yes I have been procrastinating about seeing a doctor ... might shock some to know but I have not stepped into a doctors office in well over a year now, and then it was because i had a bad cold that almost went to pneumonia and I got a round of antibiotics and steroids, and was supposed to make an appointment because I knew then I needed to get some blood work done.... well 1 week at a time procrastinating and here I am about 60 weeks or so later.... and still have not gone. The past year it is hard to admit out loud (Or type) but quality of life has somewhat declined, but mainly because of my own stubbornness. Everyone wants you to take pills or schedule tests that load you with chemicals etc.... I just didn't want to put anything into my body anymore... I haven't taken anything at all for a year now, I even stopped taking the levothyroxine for my thyroid completely at this point... early last year I was getting unable to sleep, losing weight, appetite loss... the usual symptoms and I cut the dosage in half and for a few months that was better I slept and ate again.... then it came back so I dropped it completely, that was like last October or so, and again seemed to help.... but yeah I need to get that checked out because I can't cut the dose any more ...
Doctors had said #thyroid was wiped out by #radiation treatments cause in the line of fire but could possibly regrow ... So who knows maybe I'm hyperactive now? I get occasional pancreatitis attacks and pass the random small kidney stones here and there... (I think usually as a result of trying to use over the counter pain relievers... I know its a no no but pain in one body part or another which tends to decide how the day is going that day seems to have designated himself my best buddy.

SO Any way lol #ChemoBrain I digress

So I was saying He works in mysterious ways because Yeah been #procrastinating and Know I have to see a doctor (Yuck I hate going to doctors I don't have time for that (or energy I am too busy trying to do STUFF that I need to do on a daily basis) and now in the course of doing stuff....

I was in the barn getting the horses their grain and son of a bitch something flew into my ear... and I do not mean just flew into (or maybe dropped from ceiling no idea didn't get to see it) I mean this sucker proceeded to intentionally immediately drill deeper into my ear... DO YOU KNOW HOW LOUD A BUG CRAWLING UP AGAINST YOUR EARDRUM IS? Man!!!! I mean this sucker went to town. Of course tried to get it with finger, piece of hay stalk, water from hose, etc..... nope sucker just kept burrowing.... and I am like #WTF How deep can the damn thing go? Finish with animals and by this time cannot stand the vibration in my ear and it's messing with my balance .... Up to the house..... ALCOHOL.... hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm okay well it is quiet now.... but cannot flush out and as if it is not bad enough my poor ears always ring anyway, and I can't hear well now my right ear is like muffled and irritated from alcohol and q tip digging and common sense dictates I am doing nothing but pushing it in deeper... 

GGGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRR.
Now after much swearing and fussing and stomping about in the course of all this.... I mean really I had things to get done.... I ended up doing the only thing we #CancerSurvivors can do some times.... I ended up #laughing, cracking up and looking on the #BrightSide.... Hey so you got a bug in your ear and you can't clean and go transplant the mints you were going to move today..... BUT at least I am calling the doctor... lol been so long probably not there anymore ahahaha... Who would have thunk with all the issues of the past year that I have just got through on my own a #BugInMyEar would be what makes me FINALLY go ? Well I guess since I "Have" to go in I will get some of that blood work done at least that I have put off so long .

Hello and greetings and apologies for not getting around ot checking my Google accounts lately :) I have as always and as usual been staying very  busy... It is hard to believe 2 years have flown by since Congress's shenanigans with the farm bill and limits to sales outside certain radius's made me decide the Herbal Tea business, (even though I do of course continue to grow here for friends and personal use), was just too much work for me outside and too iffy and stressful and worrisome as far as from a legal aspect and confusing tax matters to continue.

I am glad to see so many have enjoyed the information and I wanted to take a moment in response to numerous inquiries... yes anyone who would like to make use of or share the blog entries with proper credit back that is fine with me ... it is after all more about sharing knowledge with each other.

I wish I had saved the yola site info :( It was so well organized and had so many nice pictures ;) Alas I guess I waited too long, or Yola is no more? Either way links to site have gone dead so this blog is all that is left of the herb information compiled over the years.

As far as myself I am still here and still kicking ...  I have published my first book available on Amazon
http://www.amazon.com/What-Expect-When-Expecting-Cancer/dp/1492387789/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1386810477&sr=1-4&keywords=throat+cancer

I have also published a couple of children's books  http://www.amazon.com/Day-Lion-Learned-Not-Bully/dp/1493702106/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1396022614&sr=1-4&keywords=debra+paulsen   as well as begun a #Teachers Resource #Classroom & #Clubs #Children's #GroupActivity book series as well.  http://www.amazon.com/How-Lion-Learned-Not-Bully/dp/1494441349/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1396022681&sr=1-1&keywords=debra+paulsen

Currently I am working hard on a 5 book Classrooms and Clubs #Teacher Resource set about #EmergencyPreparedness for Pre K - 3rd Grade due out at the end of May.

I will try to get back here occasionally and you are of course all welcome to find me at one of the many facebook pages / groups I manage or am a member of, and I am on these regularly (lol Daily pretty much) .


https://www.facebook.com/groups/215366621962547/

https://www.facebook.com/MsmManipulatesCnnFoxArePropagandaTools


My Personal "Baby"  https://www.facebook.com/pages/R-R-O-O-T-S-Real-Restrictions-On-Officials-Trading-Stocks/296178800403843

And of course I still stay busy volunteering with my Kids at the center in our Tortoise Pack too https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-West-End-Tortoise-Pack-Mascot/178579952221774

Current World Events>>> Where Have I been

Well it has certainly been a long time since I have posted here lol. It is not that I have not been staying current, or vocal, quite the contrair, I have just mostly been hanging out and communicating via Facebook more lately.

I have a cold, which as a throat cancer survivor is especially a pain in the A#&. My nose has been so stuffed, and since my salivary glands have been severly compromised(to the point of non existent) by the radiation and chemo treatments, words cannot describe how horribly dry my throat has been and continues to be. Mouth breathing sucks:( Hey on the plus side though... I NEVER drool on my pillows anymore:)

My shoulder, after the surgery in December continues to cause pain and limitations in my life, and physical therapy (AKA Self inflicted torture) has not been able to improve the problems. My shoulder is 3x as bad now, as it was prior to surgery, and that REALLY sucks, and there is no bright side that comes to mind at the moment. GRRRR.

So, What's up in the world? I am going to be following this post with a number of "catch up" entries, based upon FB discussions over the past few weeks. I see my last post here was in regards to Egypt's uprising, so I am far behind lol. I will pass on getting into the Wisconsin / collective bargaining rights protests and Lybia for today, in lieu of catching up on "earth" events, which may be all related.
I say this because as bad as the Japan earthquake and resulting tsunami waves which threaten the US West Coast are, I think that soon we may see things getting much worse.

Goodness Gracious I Need To Update Here

Yes I have been quite busy of late, working on a number of projects at once. As if my days are not busy enough with 2x a day feeding of the horses and chickens and the rest of my animal menagerie, I am also filling herbal green tea orders for Mother Nature To You Herbal Green Teas (business has picked up with the onset of cool weather and repeat satisfied customers placing 2nd and 3rd Orders. Not only that, but I am concentrating on prepping one of my books for proofreading. Getting it completely clean and flowing you know?  Which in my case is often a major rewrite, because I am so fussy. I need to hurry up, gosh I must be related to William Wordsworth somewhere along the way. His now infamous Prelude was written and rewritten for years and years. He never considered it "right". One of his most famous works, and it ended up not being published until after his death. I don't want to do that lol:)

So as if this is not enough to keep anyone busy, on top of recovering my life post cancer, I am now faced with another decision that is consuming brain power.  I must consider whether or not to proceed with treatment for my shoulder problem. Right now at this point I am scheduled for the MRI Wednesday, and the orthopedic surgeon the following Wednesday. It is kind of a forgone conclusion between the docs that surgery will be required to fix it, how extensive we will know after the MRI. This is outside the realm of my cancer issues, and as far as we know so far, not related to radiation treatment damage. I was having trouble with the left shoulder well before cancer diagnosis, but it has worsened to the point range of motion has become very painful and limited, and it is now affecting my quality of life. I would be happy to hear comments from anyone else that has had rotator cuff surgery:) Was it easy? Was recovery quick? Did it feel better and improve your range of motion after? lol, not looking forward to ANY surgery. Boo.

But anyway, yes that's where I'm at, I'm still here truckin' along :)

Updates on Me and My Herbal 3 in 1 PetTea

Yes I know it has been a few days and I do apologize for that. For new comers to briefly update I am a cancer survivor who is in the process of getting back to living after successfully completing all of my chemo and radiation treatments for a stage IVB throat cancer diagnosis in 2009. I mentioned a few days ago that I was having a reality check because I was kind of under the weather. While I do have some issues to contend with they are related to damage from the extensive round of radiation treatments, and Not recurrent cancer.

My last PET scan was clean, so that was wonderful news:) My thyroid, which was directly in the line of fire has developed some problems though, that while not life threatening, on some days are life altering:) Best news of all this though is that I can do without my thyroid. Kind of in a wait and see holding position right now, as the docs are waiting to see if my thyroid is going to continue to degenerate, or if it will regenerate. Apparently it can go either way. I just wish it would hurry up and make up it's mind lol.

Anyone with thyroid problems can tell you whether it's hyperthyroidism or hypothyroidism the condition can make you pretty miserable until the right balance is achieved. For me it has been hyperthyroidism, and hypothyroidism because my thyroid is sick right now. Some days when the Pituitary gland asks it to produce T3 and T4 cells, it does, and other days it doesn't. I am either freezing, sleepy, and having muscle spasms and cramps among other things, and some days I am sweating profusely, and have gone 48 hours straight without sleeping. Hyper days have even sometimes caused heart fluttering and chest pains. I have been tempted to double up on my synthroid on the low days, butthat will mess up blood test results that are trying to pinpoint exactly what my thyroid is doing and what it wants, so I am not doing that. Besides with my luck I would double up and it would be a hyper period that really gets me in trouble. So very much a one day at a time thingy here:)

As far as Deb's Herbal 3 in 1 PetTea, yes it will be available at Mother Nature To You   starting tomorrow afternoon:) The results from our testing in all 3 capacities as a natural herbal pet deodorant, insect repellent and to heal wounds have been impressive, and I look forward to receiving glowing emails about this product in the near future:)
Peace and Love I am off to the barn:)

Bank of America's Response to President's Pocket VETO

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTZ!
OKAY, First off I want to say I have NO intention of getting behind on our mortgage. As I have noted before we always make it in on time. I am even hopeful that if and when the economy recovers, and when OT picks up for Kev, and when I recuperate myself, we will even be able to get back to sending in extra each month like we used to, BUT, at the moment...

We live in Ga., which is not one of the 23 states that media has reported many banks have halted foreclosures in. Our state and a few others, actually allow foreclosure proceedings to begin after missing only one month. 15 days grace means 15 day grace. The past year, between battling cancer and dealing with rising costs of living, and falling overtime opportunities for my hard working blue color husband, I admit it has been rough. There have been plenty of times we have worried that this would be the month we were short for one of the mortgages (yes we have 2). But... Cast your cares upon the Lord:)

So, anyway The announcement about the 23 states was good news, but no help to us though.

I posted yesterday I was pleased with the President's decision to use his Veto powers. Well, today I can feel the change it brought about:)

Bank of America has announced ALL Foreclosure Proceedings Halted in ALL 50 States. Hurray. The bill President Obama pocket vetoed, also known as the “Interstate Recognition of Notarizations (IRON) Act  was written by Rep. Robert Aderholt, R-Al. This is A bill which by the way passed the Senate with unanimous consent and zero commentary by major media.

A bill that now that it has been stopped, we may see a number of things coming into the light, if Bank of America's move is any indication.

I have always said things are kept hidden until they cannot be hidden any longer.

I believe what will unfold in the near future is we will find out that the IRON act was for all intents and purposes "put in to effect" at some point between its introduction in 2005 and the mortgage crisis hitting the news. In other words Before it was a Law. Now, since the act did not pass there is going to be an awful lot of paperwork that is going to need clarification.

 All I know is it is an immense weight off our shoulders, to know that we have time for things to get better, time that we will not have to be stressing AS much about losing our home. I am sure sighs went out across many homes in America today:)

Hey Everybody PET Scan results are in

Hey everybody been catching friends and family up on the good news, and I gotta get on here too... No Cancer Evident in latest PET Scan hurray!!!! Still a bit more waiting to go as we give the thyroid meds some time, and retest TSH levels over next 2 months. Doc said if the TSH levels come down, while i'm on the meds we will not have to worry about pituitary involvement as much as he is right now. 4 out of 5 of the areas that were in question he feels are tissue damage, most of them not only did not light up with the tracer, but showed little circulation at all, either way.  Doc said this is good because that means they are definitely not cancer. The thyroid gland itself did show faint tracer activity, but he said it was expected.  That's because right now I have what he said for lack of a better term we will call a form of thyroiditis. Some areas, such as sites of infection can show activity, and he said the thyroiditis accounts for the levels of activity seen there.

I will also say that as far as the thyroid meds I started last week, I have only been on the levothyroxine (I want to go name brand with the synthroid but 30$ a month with ins!) and I ALSO HAVE GOTTEN MY VOICE BACK! For the first time since the end of May, hurray! After only 5 days on the medicine, AND while I am still dealing with neck pain and headaches THE DARN EARACHES HAVE STOPPED, their still ringing away like crazy lol, but earaches suck! and I have had them pretty much constantly since May. Such a blessing to have them gone:) And the bad charlie horse leg cramps have not happened in 5 whole days now another hurray. Apparently I experienced what was known as a thyroid storm, which brought on many of the health problems I have been experiencing since end of May. He must be right, because the medicine has really made such a bi difference in how I am feeling.

I am still going through phases of hyper and hypothyroidisms, but the doctor feels this will resolve in the future. I can do without a thyroid if need be, my husband has not had one for years. It is even a slight possibility that my thyroid may regenerate, depending on how badly the radiation treatments have damaged it.  It just gets better and better :)
Peace out ALL

About the PET latest scans

Well as I posted earlier the latest PET scans were completed last Wednesday, and they said four days for report to be completed, so I didn't expect to hear anything until today anyway. I figured no news is good news. A few minutes ago my radiation oncologists office called, and they want me to come in Thursday. I didn't ask any questions, I think I will wait till I see the doc, what's a couple more days ?

PET Scans Completed

Okay well just dropping in here very briefly to let everyone know that the latest PET scan was done on Tuesday. The tech said the report should be finished in 4 days, so Wed., Thurs. Fri only makes 3, Monday will be 4. The way I am looking at it now is the old adage no news is good news is best. I figure if there was something obvious I would most likely hear sooner, so like I said no news is good news on the latest PET scan. It is 100% possible and plausible that my problems are related to damage from radiation treatments, as opposed to the return of cancer in the same place, or another.

At my last appt with my Chemo doc it was also noted that my TSH levels were way too high, 25 plus, but my t3 and t4's were on the high side of normal. Could be the thyroid pooping the bed, as it was in the line of fire for the radiation treatments, main concerns are over pituitary gland involvement. I have been started on a low dose of levothyroxine in an attempt to stabilize or lower TSH being pumped out by the pituitary, and the intent is to monitor next few months and see where these levels settle. I have only been on the medication for a few days now, and as of yet can't say I feel better, but I will give it a try. Problem is I am having hyper and hypo thyroid symptoms, but doc says this can happen when the thyroid is in the process of burning out, or dying. Some days it puts out enough and other days it doesn't I guess:)

As far as Mother Nature's Herbal Teas things are going well, and orders continue to sporadically come in from various locations. I would like to welcome the state of Florida to our list of customers:) It will be time to put the garden to bed for the season before you know it, and I look forward to focusing on writing and art as I do most winters.

Well that's it for now, must be off to the post office to ship latest order, everyone have a great day:)

PET / CT scans Approved

Well small victory won anyway. My chemotherapy  oncologists Dr. S was amazed that scans were denied, lol never saw the small man so animated as he was at the last appointment. He told them that now my TSH levels were highly elevated and that my T4 should have been low, but was high, and now there are questions of pituitary gland involvement as well as thyroid (because last CT noted a spot on thyroid at that time) and he wanted the PET scan ASAP. Last scans had pointed out a total of 5 areas in question, that there was no way to tell if this was tissue damage from radiation treatments, or recurrent cancer. I am now scheduled for Tuesday, so in a few short days, unless there is another unforeseen fiasco at the time of procedure like last week, I should get some peace of mind that can only come with further information. Here's Hoping for Clean PET / CT Scans on Tuesday:) Latest problems really could possibly be combination of radiation necrosis and thyroid problems, both of which are very treatable and correctable, and it would be really nice to find out if the damn radio tracers light up or not at these areas under debate.

Latest Updates

It is pretty late, the tail end of a sad and somber day, actually just a little after midnight of 9/11, beginning 9/12.
As quick as I can will update on how those scans went that I was supposed to do last week. You may remember I was supposed to have a full body PET and neck and chest CT on the 9th. Well that day was an absolute scheduling and insurance company fiasco. So after waiting since June with recommendations and request for a new PET from 3 different doctors because last CT was inconclusive they said could not determine if the 5 spots they noted were recurrent disease or radiation damage w/o PET. Mind you this was all the way back to April and now here we are September, and still have not accomplished getting the PET accomplished because when I got there for the appts the only one that went smoothly was the lab work/bloodtest. There was supposed to be a CT neck and chest and a full body PET, somehow they had these scheduled as all separate. Ct neck at 10, PET at 11 over in another building, then back to first building for neck and chest. Which was crazy, the PET/CT can be done at the same time same machine, you guys know what I mean. When we arrived I tried to tell them that hey, why aren't these all together, why 2 different places to go, why run contrast 3 times? Oh well we're ready for you now, lets get you in for the neck scan, and while that's being done they were going to call over the other building, set up the chest ct to be done with the PET. Well while I got the Neck CT done, they made their calls, and the insurance company, most likely because of this crazy 3 procedures in 1 day that could have been combined into one, denied my PET scan, and the chest CT. Very disappointing. Having been on edge waiting for the answer cancer or damage, this just stunk. Now I am supposed to go up again next week see my chemo and rad docs, and their going to try to figure out why the PET was denied, and get it scheduled next week. Now here's the dumb part, I already got a call and the chest CT is scheduled for the 16th, same day I see the docs, now if the docs are trying to push for a PET, here we go again insurance company is going to be looking at basically another double request so to speak. I just hope we can resolve this next week and just get the PET done. One Dr. was telling us we should just sign a waiver and get the PET done, like no problem $6,000 dollars, yes lets do that today. Sigh. Well, gee I guess I vented here pretty good lol. 

My Current Favorite Song:)

I Love music and singing, not being able to sing has been one of the suckiest parts of this whole throat cancer mess, but this song MAKES me Smile and sing....
It hurts like hell, but it feels so good, wouldn't want to stop it even if I could
just the thought of you can make me Smile:)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=arLwtHj3Ta0

You´re better then the best

I´m lucky just to linger in your life

Cooler then the flip side of my pillow that´s right

Completely unaware

Nothing can compare to where you send me

Lets me know that it´s ok yeah it´s ok

And the moments when my good times start to fade

You make me smile like the sun

Fall out of bed

Sing like a bird

Dizzy in my head

Spin like a record

Crazy on a Sunday night

You make me dance like a fool

Forget how to breathe

Shine like gold

Buzz like a bee

Just the thought of you can drive me wild

Ohh you make me smile

Even when you´re gone

Somehow you come along

Just like a flower poking through the sidewalk crack and just like that

You steal away the rain and just like that

You make me smile like the sun

Fall out of

bed sing like bird

Dizzy in my head spin like a record

Crazy on a Sunday night

You make me dance like a fool

Forget how to breathe

Shine like gold

buzz like a bee

Just the thought of you can drive me wild

Ohh you make me smile

Don´t know how I lived without you

Cuz everytime that I get around you

I see the best of me inside your eyes

You make me smile

You make me dance like a fool

Forget how to breathe

Shine like gold

buzz like a bee

Just the thought of you can drive me wild

You make me smile like the sun

Fall out of bed

sing like bird

Dizzy in my head

spin like a record

Crazy on a Sunday night

You make me dance like a fool

Forget how to breathe

Shine like gold

buzz like a bee

Just the thought of you can drive me wild

Ohh you make me smile

Ohh you make me smile

Ohh you make me smile

9/03/10
Just got done listening again, still smiling, I listen and I see my kids, my kids kids, it makes me sad too, because they're so far away, but I feel so much love, so much joy just listening... sigh miss having them all close by:(
Empty nester confessor

6 Months Post Radiation and Chemo Treatments

I try to keep it positive here as a form of therapy for myself and perhaps others in some small way, so Okay I know I have been away again for an extremely long time. I was having a hard time coming up with something positive to write about for a bit. My apologies but besides the extreme heat wave which makes it exhausting to accomplish the simplest of outside chores, I have not been not feeling so great as mentioned in some of my previous post since Memorial Day weekend. We have also been very busy getting ready for our appraisal that was "completed" last week. Why the quotes? Because I would like you to insert sarcastic tone here, most incomplete, unproffessional appraisal I have ever seen. Might as well have been a drive by, and the comps are so incomparable to what we have here. Oh Well... That will be a topic for another post when I have more time, right now I am supposed to focus on my topic which is where I am at six months out from last cancer treatment.
As you may have read here on my blog I was diagnosed with stage IVb throat cancer last year, and as of April I had clean scans... no saliva, and a few funky tastebuds that couldn't tell poop from pomegranites lol, and problems with neck and muscles from radiation damage.
I want to mention again here as far as the taste buds, because this is something many cancer treatment patients go through, I feel your pain if you are experiencing this now. I had begun chewing a Stevia leaf most mornings as I watered the garden. I was surprised that other sweet sugary foods I had tried, including apples which I love, tasted like dirt, and worse, but the stevia tasted good. There are so few things that have tasted good, and it was a treat. Well, come to find out research has shown that stevia is actually good for your oral health. As a matter of fact in many countries it is listed as a mouthwash ingredient lol.  Anyway, yes it was nice to taste something good, so I got in the habit of chewing a little piece , you only need a tiny tiny piece while I was out there. The docs have been amazed at the good conditions in my mouth at last visit. Well Guess what? I ate an apple yesterday... AND IT WAS GOOD!!!! Hurray.
Lol seriously unless you lost your ability to taste and produce saliva like those who have gone through chemo or radiation, especially of the head and neck, you could never understand how difficult it makes eating.
I had posted a month or so ago that I really missed the flavor of apples. Well we picked our ripe apples the other day, and the granny smith's are delicious:)
hehehe it is sometimes the smallest of little things in life that can bring the greatest joy:)
A tiny newborn baby, a smile, a hug... and the taste of apples.
Have hope the taste buds will return :)